7/24/2005

gasp almost a week has past since my last post! slowly but surely, time is slipping away but i haven't been taking any photos or writing anything to pin it onto a green felt board.

i know i'm sick because there are lumps in my throat and my muscles are sore, but that won't spare me from eating badly and sleeping irregularly. i must say i've had some very good food (last week's char kway teow mm!), and then zion road for beef hor fun, almost like i'm scared of missing out on the food or something, although it serious hasn't struck me yet that i'm leaving.

i am foolishly thinking i can save up all my leaving thoughts till before the day i'm leaving or something, just like how i thought i could save all my army thoughts for my ord day. but you know, singapore's not the most interesting place, but when i buy indian rojak from adam road and i walk back i realised the places do remind me of something, i don't know what, but vaguely something!

i will somehow stumble through the next few weeks, a bit of work here, some maths there, french lessons, periods of long intense boredom and erratic sleep patterns, a sprinkling of friends and small amounts of stress on travel preparations. i should read a good book but i don't know which!

and then there'll be orientation and stuff for lse in the coming weeks, and i have to continually remind myself that ALTHOUGH i feel 21 i do not look 21, and maybe i don't have all the experience a 21 year old ought to have. but it somehow strikes me that I'm going for all these pre-uni things and thinking (omg all the chicks are 18) or (young punks nowadays...) or some other variation, no it's not some structural disconnect, it's not coming back and staring at a fan after Vietnam, nor is it the narrator's disquiet upon returning home in All Quiet on the Western Front. It's just NS, and I'm going to have to get used to all these young punks and have fun where I can. the survival guide has weird pieces of advice on drugs and hiv/aids to the tune of "if you're going to do it might as well know what you're getting into. ecstacy? remember to drink water, take care of yourselves kids." And then I know that thinking people are young punks is a universal hobby for those aged 20 and above. Don't you feel old now?

and i will arrive sept 18th, a little bit bewildered, maybe a bit of a time for a trip around town and settle the myriad procedures which come about when you're arriving in a foreign country. the world will be happy, there'll be lse crush every friday and maybe i'll remember to be a nice person!

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